top of page

3 Emotional Habits That May Be Killing Your Joy

  • Jun 15, 2018
  • 3 min read

Updated: Aug 28, 2018


What emotional habits do you engage in on a daily basis, and how are these thought patterns and emotional habits guiding you closer (or pushing you further) to joy? We’ve identified three very common emotional habits that most people engage in at one point or another that could be robbing you of your potential for happiness and contentment.



1. Trying to Deny How You Actually Feel


If you’re struggling with anxiety, anger and other negative emotions, you may try to minimize these feelings in certain ways. For example, you may convince yourself “I never really liked her anyway” if a friend mistreats you, or “I never wanted that job anyway” if you don’t get an interview after submitting your resume.


Or, when we’re in a state of emotional pain, we may do and say things that minimize or ignore the pain we’re in.


For many people, the reasons we engage in this sort of denial is because we think it makes us better people, or stronger people. But this isn’t the truth.


“The problems that arise from attempting to deny our pain are many fold,” warns psychologist Lisa Firestone, PhD, in a column for Psychology Today magazine. (1) “For one, we cannot selectively cut out “negative emotions,” such as anger and sadness, while maintaining the ability to feel joy and happiness. When we cut off our emotions, we become numb to life. We lack direction or meaning. We lose touch with our desires that could result in goal-directed behavior. We often relive our past or live out prescriptions for our lives created in our childhoods.”

In other words, by minimizing sadness or other negative emotions, we also minimize our own ability to experience positive emotions like joy.



2. Avoiding Uncomfortable Thoughts, Ideas, Feelings and Emotions


Embarrassment. Disappointment. Fear.


These are all common uncomfortable emotions that we tend to try and avoid or keep out of our lives.


But here’s the thing: That uncomfortable feeling is a signal that this is an opportunity to learn, grow and become stronger. We have to go THROUGH uncomfortable feelings in order to truly learn and expand as individuals.


Avoiding these emotions at all costs simply denies us the chance to truly grow, and in this growth is where the true potential for joy and happiness unfolds.


The next time you feel uncomfortable, step into that feeling. Ask yourself why you feel uncomfortable, and look for situations and opportunities in that moment to learn and become better.



3. Craving Ethereal Happiness


Everyone wants to be happier. It’s on the cover of every self-help book and lifestyle magazine. It’s also likely why you’re here on this website and reading this specific article!


But chasing after something - including happiness - can bring negative consequences. This projection of your mind into the future, where you think more happiness lies, takes you out of the present moment and it’s only in the present that actual joy can occur.


“The past gives you an identity and the future holds the promise of salvation, of fulfillment in whatever form,” says Eckhart Tolle. “Both are illusions. We define ourselves by what we have done in the past not realizing that we are limiting ourselves by doing so. Realize that something completely new can happen for you and change that definition. Moreover, we should stop seeking happiness in the future. It’s not something that will come by tomorrow. Happiness is a by-product of how you act in the present. It is not the end goal.”

Instead, look for moments of happiness and joy in the very present moment that’s not based on “if only” ideas of the past of “what if” ideas of the future. Seek presence, and out of that flows contentment and happiness.



References:

 
 
 

33 Comments


wazaf
Mar 11

Despite its increasing acceptance, marijuana remains a controversial substance due to potential health risks. Some studies suggest https://thepurpleshopcannabis.com/ that heavy use may contribute to mental health disorders such as schizophrenia in vulnerable individuals. Other concerns include respiratory issues from smoking and the possibility of dependency, especially among habitual users.

Like

wojurixid
Feb 24

LIMS enhances collaboration between laboratory teams by providing centralized data storage and sharing capabilities. Researchers, technicians, and https://www.blazesystems.com/ administrators can access real-time information, reducing communication barriers. This collaboration improves efficiency, minimizes redundant tasks, and promotes a cohesive working environment within laboratory operations.

Like

unknownytube
Feb 24

Click here provide members with discounts on over-the-counter medications, vitamins, and health essentials, promoting better health management and cost-effective wellness solutions. kaiserotcbenefits.com - more details here


Click here help you find recent death notices, providing information about funeral services, memorials, and tributes for loved ones in your area. obituariesnearme.com - more details here


Click here? Many users have had mixed experiences with the platform, so it's important to read reviews and verify deals before booking. istravelurolegit.com - more details here

Like

vopydagiji
Feb 04

Mortgage brokers cater to a wide range of clients, including self-employed individuals and those with unconventional income sources. Traditional https://www.360lending.ca/ banks may have stricter lending criteria, making it difficult for certain borrowers to secure loans. Brokers work with specialized lenders who offer flexible loan products tailored to unique financial situations.

Like

vopydagiji
Feb 03

People with sensitive skin often prefer laser hair removal because it eliminates the risk of razor burns, ingrown hairs, and skin irritation https://www.distilllaserclinic.com/ caused by shaving or waxing. It is a gentler alternative that helps maintain smooth and healthy skin without frequent manual intervention.

Like
Contact

© 2024 Achieve Today. All rights reserved.

707 E Timpanogos Parkway

Orem, UT 84097

​​

Tel: 801.ACHIEVE

Free: 800.748.5199

support@achievetoday.com

  • Black Facebook Icon
  • Black Twitter Icon
  • Black LinkedIn Icon
  • Black Instagram Icon
  • Apple Music Social Icon
bottom of page