Confidence starts in your mind. If you want to feel more confident in your own self-worth, value and skills, take a quick assessment of your internal mindset and practice the following five habits that all successful people follow.
1. Don’t Pressure Yourself to Feel Confident 100% of the Time
Being confident doesn’t mean you never second guess yourself. This is actually a healthy part of being confident without being overly confident or narcissistic (which can undo the benefits of self-confidence).
If the occasional bit of doubt creeps in, know that this is a natural strategy that your brain uses to problem solve, prepare itself for potential setbacks, and keep you on your toes so you can achieve your goals without being sabotaged by the unexpected.
The next time you feel a little doubt in your mind, express gratitude to your mind for helping you think about how things could go wrong, so you’re prepared to ensure they don’t.
2. Engage in a Realistic Inner Monologue
We all have a voice constantly running through our head. For many people, it critiques and attacks and offers negative criticisms on what you’re doing or thinking.
Truly confident people instead engage in realistic internal monologues. This voice supports them when things don’t go as planned. It encourages them to press forward. And it says words of love and compassion when the going gets tough.
For example, the voice might say, “Sure, the work project didn’t go as planned, but since your boss only gave you two hours to prepare, you did as good of a job as you could have!”
In the above example, your inner voice acknowledges reality while also helping to practice grace and confidence.
The next time you feel your inner voice running away from you, steer it back to a place of positivity by asking:
● What actually happened? (The facts, not your judgment or interpretation of the facts)
● What is one good thing that you did during this moment? (This practices self-compassion and gratitude)
3. Reframe Failure
When things don’t go as planned (you get fired from a job, or your kid fails a test, or you burned dinner), it’s easy to instantly catastrophize. “I’ll be poor, my kid won’t be able to get into college, and I never get recipes right!” you might exclaim.
But confident people know how to reframe a failure. Rather than it being a zero-sum, all-or-nothing scenario, they look at a failure as a mere challenge or an opportunity to try something new.
In a study published in the Frontiers research journal, scientists found that this type of analyzation of failures can actually reduce stress while helping you to improve your performance in the future. (1) In other words, it removes the stress in the present moment while ensuring future success, which in turn builds your confidence here and now, as well as in the future!
If you want to learn more about how to boost your confidence, we have many courses on this topic, including how your body language can affect your confidence levels! Explore this topic more with CUE, our free virtual coach. It’s completely free. Click here to get free access now!